Recent Comments

Evan
8/2/20, 9:43 AM
Pity about the formatting glitch. Sorry you have to fix it up but I am looking forward to reading it when it's sorted out. The tags and concept sound really interesting.
8/2/20, 8:38 AM
Hummm.... Dace, You forgot to put paragraph in the text... It's readable, but could you please edit the story to add some space?
Johnthedoe
7/31/20, 5:35 AM
Yeah the original version was much less cramped but my brain added so many interconnected plot lines that trying to fit it in the word count allowance of the challenge scrambled everything. It's taking me quite some time to weave them all back together but I will make it happen.
7/30/20, 3:53 PM
Just wanted to say that I think upon a slight rewrite and expansion this saga would be really quite amazing. The individual scenes were quite compelling and enjoyable for all that I had some confusion on the pov switches and such.
Johnthedoe
7/22/20, 9:15 AM
No worries the rewrite is currently in progress and there'll be plenty of sequels after the true ending of this story. I do have an entire world to take over after all.
7/21/20, 10:31 PM
More please. This needs to be redone and drawn out day by day then continuing after transformation. Excellent story.
Johnthedoe
7/19/20, 5:33 AM
It's coming. I've already started adding everything I yanked out trying to make it fit in the space allowed by the challenge back in. Expect an unknown number of chapters sometime in early August after the challenge ends.
7/19/20, 5:19 AM
Really need more of this
Johnthedoe
7/17/20, 6:57 AM
Yeah it is. The original intro gave more introduction to each of the characters present and made it more obvious the perspective was shifting at each break but it got cut when I was trying (and failing) to condense this monster to fit in under 10k words as per the rules of the challenge. The characters also each had longer sections for each of them and hinted a bit more at who was going next before everything got condensed and confusing. Once I start expanding it back over the multiple chapters it should have had to start with there will be fewer per chapter which should help keep what's happening straight. The idea really couldn't work on such a tight word budget and I wish I caught on soon enough to replace it as my entry with something smaller.
7/17/20, 6:29 AM
Is the story switching first-person narrators in each section? I was just so confused trying to keep track of all these characters and the complex mythology and (I think) the shifting perspectives.